No, seriously, I am only half kidding. If there was a such thing as a potty trainer for hire, I would be all over that. ‘Cause as good as I may or may not be as an educational researcher, professor, and general parent, I fail in the potty training department. My list of recent failures:
1. Letting Buddy slide off the toilet and bonk his head while he was reaching for a Nat Geo magazine about the Titanic.
2. Nearly dropping Buddy in the toilet when I forgot to put down the child’s seat.
3. Failing to notice Buddy peeing all over the floor, dog bowl, and wall…but celebrating the incident because it was in the bathroom and the bad aim was not intentional.
4. Rewarding potty behavior with Matchbox cars, as now he hoards them and tries to go constantly, even when he doesn’t need to.
5. Celebrating a dry day with underwear…and putting on three more pairs one after another as he peed on each of them.
I think my potty training license needs to be revoked. Tips? Encouragement? Help?!?